Meesa most hated character in Star Wars!

Those three innocuous words fill any die-hard Star Wars fan with revulsion.

A coworker of mine is engaged to a die-hard fan.  She never watched any of the Star Wars movies until she met him.  He has only “allowed” her to watch Episodes IV, V, and VI (the older ones). [Don’t worry, it’s a healthy relationship – she has absolutely no desire to watch the new ones.]

As I said, he’s a die-hard fan.  They’ve talked about having Han and Leia cake toppers on their wedding cake (I’ll give you one guess whose idea that was.)

So I’m enlisting her in a prank.  I’ve explained who Jar Jar Binks is to her, and she’s going to bring it up to him in a little scene that should go something like this:

Her: Oh honey, I saw the coolest thing today.

Him: Yeah, what was it?

Her: It’s something from Star Wars.  And I want to include it on our cake, ok?

Him: *eyes lighting up* Yes? What was it? A working replica of a light saber? A tie fighter? A foot-high model of the Death Star?

Her: No silly, none of those things.  No, I saw a clip on Youtube.  He’s the cutest character, and so silly.  Let’s see, his name was…Jar Jar Binks, I think?

Him: *aghast* No. No no no no no nononono.  For all that is holy, no. Anything but that.

Her: Oh, why not sweetie?  He’s so cute, with that long tongue, and big floppy ears.  And that cute accent? “Meesa hungry!”  I love that!

Him: …

Her: Oh come on baby, pleeeeease?

Him: No. Anything but that.

Her: Oh, ok, fine.  How about an Ewok then? Or one of those “pod racers” that Jar Jar Binks was fixing? OOH! How about an Ewok riding IN a pod racer? Wouldn’t that be adorable?

Him: …

Him: I’d like the engagement ring back, please.


Come to think of it, maybe this isn’t such a good idea for a prank, after all.