So you think you had a rough childhood? Check out these pics and THEN tell me you had a rough childhood!
Of course, first, I had professional photographers constantly documenting my "chubby baby syndrome".
And then, pretty much as soon as I could stand, my parents put me to work. Don't be fooled by my cheery expression. I was told that I would not get my daily ration of Spaghetti-O's if I did not smile for the camera.
My parents were always dressing me up in silly costumes to entertain the throngs of the people at the local parks. After I'd put on a performance, I'd wander through the crowd, passing a hat for spare change.
When I became too old to be cute during these performances, I was conscripted in a theme-based child-labor factory manufacturing cheap Native American knockoff goods. We had to dress in costumes for the tour groups that came by every half hour. Sometimes I would smuggle out a single feather or bead, and slowly built my own set of bongo drums that I then sold on the black market to pay for my raging Pixy Stix habit.
I had to take all my baths in the kitchen sink. I didn't even get the whole sink to myself; I had to share it with one of my two brothers.
And finally, when my youngest brother was old enough to handle the guitarrón (acoustic bass), we three brothers were forced to start our very own mariachi band to entertain at the neighborhood synagogue. Unfortunately, we could not afford the traditional charro outfits, and instead had to adorn ourselves in the cast-offs of the local children. Our band's name, of course, was Vlad and the Transformer Tigers. Unfortunately, the infighting began during post-production of our first record album, and it never saw the light of day.
So now you've seen the sordid truth of my youth. I'm actually not out to find out who had the worst childhood, but I am curious – what was YOUR childhood like? Bonus points if you post pictures of your own, or link to ones you've already posted in the past…
[NaBloPoMo 2008 – #17 / 30]
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