Tag: puns

Puns Upon a Time…

I was feeling silly and wanted to blow off some steam from the crazy work crunch, so I made a picture:

What do you call this?  An LOLfruit?  Whatever you call it, I'm afraid it's not pear-y good.

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Political Pun(dits)?

Actual conversation w/ my wife this morning over the Iowa Caucus results:

Dee: I'm getting so depressed that our next president is going to be some sort of former Baptist preacher or the like.

Me: What, you don't think a Democrat has a chance this time around?

Dee: I wish I could say yes, but it just seems all the voters in this country are all about religion, and vote purely on that basis.

Me: Well, from what I've heard, the major Democratic candidates have been pushing their religious beliefs, too.  I think they have a chance to sway some of the votes from those voting just on religious basis, and then they've got others to support them, too.

Dee: I wish I could think so, but I just don't have faith.

Me: Were you making a pun at 6:45 in the morning?  Isn't that a little early for puns?

Dee: No, I never pun on purpose.

Me: Ah, so all your puns are punintentional?

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Ross Hunt (or Whatever It’s Called) Winners!

Hope everyone who celebrates Thanksgiving had a fantastic turkey day and I hope you are now well on your way to recovering from the food, fun, and festivities.  For everyone else, hope you had a good week, and yay, it's the weekend again!

We had 4 entrants in my guest-host contest, all of which had me laughing at one point or another in their entries.  And upon further review of the piles of junk in my garage, I have confirmed that every entrant wins a prize, consolation or otherwise! 

(In all seriousness, I do have something special for each entrant that will have them shouting out loud with a resounding "MEH.  I guess that was worth entering this week's contest."  Please send me a quick note with your address – I promise you won't be disappointed.  [Or at least don't reveal your disappointment to me])

The judging was tough, but you can see how it was done by reading the following, or just skip to the winner announcements below:

1. Best Yod Art: Although this was a close race, in the end I had to give this one to snoringKatZ.  Cranky, flattery will usually get you anywhere, but in this case, the pun is mightier than the apple polishing.  Or something like that.

2. The Tourist Attraction I'm Planning to Visit on my Next Vacation: Definitely Cranky's Crap Emporium.  There's no doubt in my mind that this will make it big.  As long as Wal-Mart doesn't try to horn in on your business – watch out for that, Cranky!

3. My Alternative to Thanksgiving Would Be: Another Thanksgiving, apparently.  You folks really don't want to give up this holiday!  With that said, Ebby's comment that this used to be the only day where Yod was able to eat white-people food cracked me up, and took the birthday-cake on this one.

4. Easiest to Blackmail:
Cranky, when I saw your photo for #1, I immediately thought it trumped any blackmail photo you could have shared with us.  Apparently you agreed.  However, you were blown clear out of the water by WPG's blackmail photos, red duct-tape and all.  Those are some seriously hostile working conditions!

5. The Worst Pun-ishment for the Readers: Your puns all made me groan, but only snoringKatZ's made me run out of the room screaming.

With that said, this week's winner for the GRAND PRIZE is snoringKatZ!  Congratulations, your skill with the slap-dash entry knows no bounds.

WPG – You still won the first-entry prize and will be receiving that prize and some lovely parting gifts, along with my sympathy for anyone who still has to work in that hellmouth building.

Crankypants – Unfortunately, you didn't win the GRAND PRIZE, but I have something specific in mind for your consolation prize.  As a bonus, it's not going to take up a lot of space, so you'll still have lots of room in your Crap Emporium for your regular sales stock.  Oh, and I'm seriously considering making your blackmail photo my desktop wallpaper for a little while.  Heehee.

Ebby – I don't live in a cat household, and I'm fresh out of catnip.  However, I have a nice selection of small consolation gifts that you can share with your Daddy – I bet you can work out a trade with him for something more suitable for a kitty like yourself.  And let him know that if he doesn't want his gifts, they'd probably make decent additions to Yod Hunt prizes for future contests :-)

Thanks everyone for playing.  Hopefully you had as good a time entering my guest contest as I had reading your entries!  I now return control of the hunt back to the group's founding father, the man with the plan, YOD himself!

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Isn’t It Time for Some Football Already?

For those who have no desire to hear about football and/or fantasy football, I promise to keep my fantasy football posts down to 1 per week, max.  Most likely it'll involve just a recap of my team for the week, but might occasionally include some random football-related stuff.

Well, the regular season starts tonight, and my league drafted our Fantasy Football teams last night, just in time to get our starting rosters set up.  I have my lineup in place, we'll see how it goes…

For those curious about the team name – being the sole Jewish person in my league, for the past 5-6 years I've done various puns and or names using the word Jew for my team name, including JewsYourIllusion and DaJews.  I'm running low on names for next year, so if anyone has some suggestions, I'm all ears.

Anyway, I'm pretty satisfied with my team.  My QB and running backs should consistently get me some decent points, and at least 2 of my wide receivers should hit big yardage figures on a regular basis.  I had Graham as my kicker last year and he can't be beat, especially when Cincinnati gets into trouble.  I'm not so sure about my tight end or defense, but we'll see how they fare for the first few weeks.  I've got backups for each position, but we'll see if I need them.

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